Saturday, December 02, 2006

Ralph Piss is Funny -- And Willing to Prove It!

DUMMYCRAT DIAMOND SAYS REPUBLICANS AREN'T FUNNY

RALPH PISS ACCEPTS HIS CHALLENGE, ANNOUNCES NYC COMEDY APPEARANCE

One thing that can never be said about Ralph Piss, my fellow Americans, is that he does not enjoy a good yuk. I know, because I am Ralph Piss, and I do enjoy a good yuk. Come to think of it, that was a good yuk right there.

But when I'm flipping through the channels on TV, I'm always disappointed by the comedy that's on these days. Some of it's funny, but nearly all of it is liberal. Since the liberals control the media, only lefty extremists like David Letterman and Jerry Seinfeld get to be the comedy stars, while hilariously funny right-wing comedians, like the fabulous Julia Gorin, are ignored. This is a tragedy, not a comedy!

And that is why I'm so thrilled about the wonderful news that Fox News Channel is launching a right-wing answer to The Daily Show! But unlike the lame and unpopular Daily Show, this one might actually be funny. It's created by Joel Surnow, the genius behind 24 -- a dark and disturbing dystopian fantasy about what would happen if America had a black president.

Well, it's no surprise that the Dummycrat liberal bloggers are fit to be waterboarded. It's terrifying to them that Fox, the most trusted name in news, could become the most trusted name in comedy as well. Soon Fox will be the most trusted name in everything, and nobody will trust any other names ever again. But not if the lefties have their way. Dummycrat Diamond is so upset, he even says that Republicans can't be funny! Well, I say HA! THAT SOUNDS LIKE A CHALLENGE!

To prove that Republicans can be funny, I, Ralph Piss, will deliver twenty minutes of sparkling right-wing wit, in person, at an undisclosed Manhattan location on the holy night of Wednesday, December 13.

My performance, sure to go down in history as one of comedy's greatest moments, will be filmed for the upcoming documentary film Who is Ralph Piss? This is a hot ticket, my fellow Americans, and space is limited because we're filled to the gills with V.I.P.s. But if you think you're such a big shot, e-mail me and I will see what I can do about getting you in. The rest of you will see the film soon!

LEFT-WING DOMINANCE OF AMERICAN COMEDY ENDS ON DECEMBER 13!

That's all for now, my fellow Americans. I'm going to practice my act.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Break a leg!