SO-CALLED "VERY NICE EVENING" IS NOT GOING TO BE VERY NICE!

Just in case any of you were thinking about going to A VERY NICE EVENING, my fellow Americans, let me strongly advise against it! All the hype and publicity surrounding this event suggest that it's going to be a very nice evening, but trust me, it's NOT going to be a very nice evening. You know why? I'll tell you why. Because this so-called "very nice evening" is nothing more than another ANTI-AMERICAN HATE-FEST from DUMMYCRAT DIAMOND and his disgusting liberal friends! So DO NOT GO TO THE VERY NICE EVENING! It will NOT be VERY NICE, and if you go then you are probably a terrorist!

NOT VERY NICE!

More Leftist Drivel from Dummycrat Diamond

Well, my fellow Americans, the liberal crowd -- also known as the enemies of freedom -- is at it again. Revelling in our President's allegedly low approval ratings (obviously fabricated by the Dummycrat media), they're still taking every opportunity to see that the evil forces of Islamic terrorism and secular humanism triumph in their mission to destroy American values.

And the worst of them is Dummycrat Diamond, who believe it or not is STILL publishing dangerous left-wing lies on his badly-written blog. His most recent entry is full of nasty attacks on people of faith, because if there's one thing a liberal hates, it's God. But that's okay, because God hates them too.

Diamond refers to decent, God-fearing Americans as "crazed, hysterical zealots" and"religious lunatics." He even has the nerve to portray the great patriots at Operation Save America as "a well-known group of criminally insane ideologues who take mythology literally and subscribe to an alternate, fictitious version of American history."

He's really stupid. God will punish him, and so will President Brownback.

Right-Wing Comedy Takes YouTube by Storm

One of my YouTube videos, Ralph Piss: Conservative Comedian, has been getting a lot of positive attention lately, which is very exciting! It now seems there is nothing standing between Ralph Piss and a career in show business. I want to be the Republican Charlie Chaplin. Here's a sampling of some of the inspiring and encouraging comments my fans have left on YouTube:

"That was hilarious...i hope you do make it to 1/2 hr news hr!"

"Conservitives do need a comedian!"

"i think you're funny as hell and 100% right on the issues...it's obvious you have talent!...keep it up and post more asap."

"WOW!"

"hell of an effort!"

"hilarious!"

Watch the video and join the conversation! There are now six clips on the Ralph Piss YouTube Channel.

ONE RED STATE IN 2008!

Wise Words from Our Second-Greatest Republican President

"Congressmen who willfully take action during wartime that damage the morale and undermine the military are saboteurs, and should be arrested, exiled, or hanged." -- Abraham Lincoln

Surnow's "Half Hour News Hour" Premieres Sunday!

It was a gloomy morning, my fellow Americans, but it was enlivened by the HILARIOUS clip I found on YouTube of the BRILLIANT news satire show which the GENIUS producer Joel "24" Surnow is about to launch on the Fox News Channel! It's called The Half Hour News Hour -- I love it, even the title is funny! -- and it premieres Sunday night! Ralph Piss, for one, will be watching.

I've been excited about this show for a long time, ever since I read about it in Forbes, the handbook of the ruling class. Here's a clip of me talking about it, and about how it inspired me to be a comedian, from my sold-out 2006 extravaganza, Ralph Piss Live:



There's another GREAT Half Hour News Hour clip on this page. Get this -- Rush Limbaugh plays the President of the United States, and Ann Coulter is Vice President! But if you go to watch that clip, ignore the stupid comments of the liberal Dummycrat who posted it. Don't worry, after the Rapture we won't have to tolerate his kind any longer.

I can tell The Half Hour News Hour is going to cheer me up, with a lot of laughs and a lot of patriotism, during this terrible dark age of the Dummycrat congressional majority. I know in my heart that America is going to be ONE RED STATE IN 2008, and I have discussed this with Jesus Christ, but what neither of us could figure out is which Republican candidate to get behind. I love Rudy Giuliani as a Hero of 9/11, but let's face it, he's gay, and a liberal. Mitt Romney is also gay. Sam Brownback understands the meaning of "American values," but the name Brownback sounds a little too gay.

My fellow Americans, I never thought I'd say this, back in 2000 or so. But something has changed since then.

John McCain has turned into George W. Bush.

Ralph Piss endorses John McCain for President of the United States.